Starting a cult is not easy, but the rewards may be well worth it.  Not only are there many potential financial benefits, you are sure to be as revered by your followers as hated by everyone else. As the old saying goes, “There’s no such thing as bad publicity.” With any luck, you will be preserved forever in the annals of history, but before we get too far ahead of ourselves…we have a lot of work to do. Let’s get started.

Step 1: Foster your own personal mystique.

Cult leaders are successful because they behave in a way that invokes admiration and trust.  You must act and speak with absolute confidence. Your knowledge should seem other wordly and not rely on common sense. Cult followers do not like common sense. They want to believe that the rest of the world is and possibly always was wrong.  If they don’t see you as possessing special abilities to understand the past and prepare for the future, you will not last long.

This also implies that you begin somewhere where no one else knows you. As Jesus (See Step 3) famously noted, “A prophet has no honor in his own country.” Keep your past shrouded in mystery and destiny.

Step 2: Other beliefs be damned.

Cults cannot be “another way” they must be the only way.  You, as leader, must require that those who wish to follow you reject every other belief system and separate themselves from friends and family members who do not share the cults beliefs.  Most potential cult followers come from dysfunctional families and will jump at the chance separate themselves from the rest of society. They are already outcasts, they are just waiting for someone to affirm their lifestyle. Isolation also protects from dissenters and reason. 

Step 3: Jesus was just a really nice guy.

If your cult is going to work, it is important that Jesus be portrayed as a really nice guy who in no way was God. This is especially important for cults started in Western culture due to the extremely large influence Judeo-Christian beliefs hold.  In addition to being the cornerstone of the world’s oldest and most popular religion, Jesus is also infamous for making rather exclusive statements about himself. (”I am the way, the truth, and the life.”) When this is considered, the neccessity of removing Jesus’ divinity becomes clear.  You may find it helpful to emphasize the importance of Jesus’ example as a Jewish teacher.  This compromise will allow you to establish your own “way” while still giving lip service to the rest of the world’s Hero. There are simply no reputable cults who do not follow this rule.

Step 4: Pick a doctrine and a destination.

Most cults operate on simple premises with an extremely complex web of inferences that possibly no one, even the cult leaders, understand.  Joseph Smith was a prophet. (Mormons) The world is ending in 1900 1914 1918 1970 the relatively near future. (Jehovas Witnesses) We are all spiritual aliens living an infinite number of lifetimes over many trillions of years. (Scientology).  The complex pyramid of beliefs upon which this central doctrine rests will give your followers the confidence that there are many questions and as many answers…all of which you have and most of which they may not be entitled to without due service.

Equally important is the destination: What are you working towards?

Will your followers eventually become gods? (Mormonism)
Will they work to become part of an extremely exclusive group of those who are permitted to go to heaven? (Jehovas Witnesses)
Will you all committ suicide? (Heaven’s Gate, Movement for the Restoration of The Ten Commandments, etc)

Without a destination or goal, your cult is unlikely to ever get off the ground.

Step 5: Keep em’ busy and under control.

You aren’t just designing a belief system; you are designing a way of life.  Your moral system should provide as much activity as it does prohibit activity.  This can be anything. Other succesful cults have required large amounts of money for training, constant proselytizing, reproduction, etc. Be creative. Don’t be afraid to try something new.  You can also win points by prohiting activites the rest of the world sees as harmless. Popular selections include: alcohol/coffee/meat during the winter (Mormons), birthdays (Jehovas Witnesses), medication (Scientology, Christian Science), or even sex (The Shakers).

Don’t under estimate the value of a scape goat.  From time to time, it important to instill a sense of fear in your followers.  Kick skeptics out early and often. This display of your power will encourage others to follow your rules closely lest they also lose their position in your community.

Step 6: Establish home base…and a newsletter!

An easy way to control the behavior, cohesiveness, and outside contact of your cult is to establish a compound, perferably in a rural area.  Doing so helps foster a sense of community. Through believing and behaving identically, the self is demphasized and your ability to appear God-like or Supreme is enhanced. Everyone wins!

Some may find this model too restrictive, preferring instead to attempt mass appeal. This can be done by publishing and distributing a cult newsletter.  Great care should be taken to make this publication look as legitimate and non-cult like as possible.  Use an abiguous name and establish false credibility.  A good example of this would be The Watchtower, a publication of the Jehovas Witnesses.

Step 7: It’s all about the conspiracy.

It is human nature to love a good conspiracy.  The truth, by comparison, is often very droll.  The rest of the world is unlikely to embrace you, your belief system, or your followers. You must convince your loyalists that your cult represents the last remnant of truth. Everyone else – religious leaders, governments, agnostics, Miley Cyrus - is trying to supress the truth because they are afraid that the rest of the world will be equally liberated.

Step 8: Don’t be afraid to play the victim card.

Your followers are more likely to devote themselves to you and your cause if they see you as a perpetual martyr, fighting the good fight.  We all love underdog stories.   Handle persecution with “righteous” anger or surreal calm. Either response will garner you more respect and devotion.

Step 9: Profit

Once you have your followers full indoctrinated, procuring the funds you need to build a mansion, buy a yacht, or enlarge operations should be easy.  Your followers are likely to see their money as a community asset and sacrifice whatever neccessary for the good of the cult.

Step 10: Above all else: have fun

Don’t be afraid to do something crazy. Want to write your own translation of the Bible? Go for it! (Mormons, Jehovas Witnesses, etc) Want to have sex with your friends’ wives? It’s as easy as writing a new revelation. (Joseph Smith, leader of the Mormons)

As cult leader, you will quickly find that there are few rules where you are concerned. Your followers, having forsaken family, friends, and wordly possessions to join your cult are likely to support you no matter how crazy your proposition.

If you don’t exploit this, why start a cult at all? 

There are limits, however.  While it may be fun, attacking a nearby city or massacring dissenters (both are famous Mormon past times) is the shortest route to imprisonment. So, unless this is part of your eventual goal (and it may be), try not to do anything that will require the local government to summon their militia. 

Now stop talking and go start a cult!